Faith 7

My growing confidence in the Bible allowed me to focus on the New Testament, setting aside what I now saw as inferior books and unpromising religious traditions. I started reading books about the Bible and the Christian faith, still unwilling to make a commitment to a decision about faith in Jesus Christ. A book that caught my attention was Evidence That Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell, first published in 1979 and revised over the years. For a trial lawyer who deals with evidence every day, the title alone was compelling for two reasons. Facts are stubborn things, and so is evidence of those facts. And facts require a decision. I was challenged on both scores. I was comfortable not making a decision about the person of Jesus Christ, about who he claimed to be, and the evidence of miracles he performed. Someone suggested to me that a decision not to decide is a decision. There it was, right in my face, the obvious position I was in, thinking that I did not have to make a decision. Telling myself I did not have to reach a verdict based on evidence. Another barrier was being challenged.

I needed someone to talk to who could answer questions and not criticize my indecision about Jesus Christ. Remembering his earlier offer, I told Dennis Swanson I had changed my mind about a Bible study. Dennis worked for the State Parks Department, had some flexibility in his schedule, and was willing to adjust to accommodate my overly demanding schedule (another point of pride). We started a weekly meeting at my office in the courthouse annex at 4 PM, just before closing time. Dennis did not look or act like a terrorist, but among the courthouse staff, there was a chill in the air as he walked through the building to my back corner office. All eyes were on the affable man carrying his well-worn Bible with bookmarker ribbons hanging out of the ends as he walked to the boss’s office.

Dennis started our study with a workbook-style series of publications from The Navigators designed for Bible 101 adult students. The focus was on the New Testament and the person of Jesus Christ. I asked questions, discussed the Bible text, and explored the deeper meaning of the life of Jesus Christ. If Dennis did not know the answer to my questions, he promised to return the following week with answers. No matter how difficult the questions or how much doubt my questions exposed, Dennis was never offended or put on defense.

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